Have you thought about lately what you do with the treasures that others have buried inside you?
Quoting an often remembered parable “The kingdom of heaven is like treasure hidden in a field, which a man found and covered up. Then in his joy he goes and sells all that he has and buys that field.”
My mother’s love language was acts of service. Without any conscious purpose I have spent the majority of my life pursuing the following professions, military, police, and education. All of which gave me opportunities to help, protect, and cultivate. Now I’m taking the time to consider what it means to be my mother’s son.
One of her defining traits was fostering. Her grandmother showed her what that meant while raising her from infancy. As a child my mother practiced it with her cousins. As an adult she continued it with coworkers, friends and acquaintances throughout her life.
I am humbled by the daily experience where I engage in the same fostering my mother once did. This manifests as a cherished memory now. One I welcome with warm embrace. Thankfully, I have powerfully available visual cues to remind me of how my mother’s spirit remains present in her absence.
It occurs to me that similar expressions will be born out in her other children, grandchildren, and those others whom she endowed with her loving legacy. There is a good sized list. My hope is that in the days ahead that we live without her, each of us still recognize how we operate as an extension of the seeds she planted within us.
What about you? Who do you think about? What do you remember? What do you see in your life that must have come from them? Will the idea of honoring the heritage they passed on to you bring you peace, comfort, or assurance? Will it bring healing and restoration? Will it help you bury your treasures in the right fields?
Carbohydrates are a problem. At least for me. So out of necessity I searched for a short-term solution where I could cut carbs and lose weight too. I am getting to the point where I need to settle in on a long-term alternative for my diet. This is a good time to reflect on where eating and maintaining Ketosis arrived as a tool for me.
I began with strict daily calorie counts. 25 grams maximum of carbs. To reach the level of fat burning I wanted, my ratio of 4% Calories from carbs, 15% from protein and 81% from fat was what I followed. So, with about 2000 calories daily, I had 77 grams of protein and 184 grams of fat to eat.
Was it hard? You bet it was. Finding enough fat to eat seemed almost impossible. The shock for me was realizing how much the typical American diet is high carb and “low” fat. What was good for me is that I reached Ketosis quickly and saw early weight loss. I did not stay on it very long because of the health risks people around me kept reminding me of.
I found that using a dieting app was indispensable. After looking around a bit I went with Lifesum. The choice of diets with the app were a factor for me. I soon switched to their Ketogenic easy. This meant I now got to eat a whopping 100 grams of carbs each day. My ratio changed to 20% calories from carbs, 15% from protein and 65% from fat. The bad news was that my protein stayed at 77 grams per day. The shift up by 75 grams of carbs was offset by a reduction in 35 grams of fat down to 149 grams a day.
While that may seem easy as the name implies, at first it was hard for me to get up to 100 carbs. I began with the idea that by eating about 4 times I could average about 25 grams of carbs per meal. This average was significant for me because I was wary of how large swings in carb consumption would affect blood sugar.
One of the biggest benefits from this new diet was that it led me on an unending search for healthy, convenient, nutritious and consumable sources of carbohydrates. So many of these foods checked off some of the boxes but not all. They might be extremely hard to prepare, or even harder to digest! Some are delicate and challenging to use. It seemed like the window of when they are ripe, and edible was so small that if you didn’t have a backyard garden full of trees giving birth to them the moment before you ate some, then forget it.
Another benefit was that I lost weight, and on a gradual timeline. I learned over time how I would be able to maintain my goal weight once I reached it. With the 2000 calorie plan, any day I burned more than I consumed contributed to my weight loss. The app was a big help with measuring my daily calorie burns.
Eat at least 4 meals at regular intervals. If fasting, plan the fasting periods with care.
Avoid unhealthy calories. These can lead to very bad consequences. Take the time and make the effort to find healthy types of fat, protein, and carbohydrates for your diet and then eat them in healthy amounts.
Counting calories is a good habit to have. Knowing how much you are eating keeps you out of danger.
Counting the calories that you burn each day has huge benefits. This lets you know if your amount of exercise is contributing to a healthy lifestyle or an unhealthy one.
Healthy dieting can provide better alternatives than caffeine and other stimulants people depend on.
There are so many things to learn about diet and exercise that can impact not only your health but your brain, your skin, your energy, even your sleep.
I come to you with sad news of the death of my close relative. And while life does go on, I’ll never be the same. I want to say now that fact is accepted. For her life meant so much to me that the loss will forever change how I approach my world. However, I need to recover and eventually arrive to a place where I am thriving. That will take time, effort and help from people such as you.
How can you help? Your tolerance with me when you see me feeling bad, your patience with any unexplained anger I show can help me heal. Seeing you, gives me a chance to lean on your strength. I won’t ask you for advice. But when I of course do ask you, be assured that I won’t heed what you tell me, or even appear to appreciate it. I will appreciate your reaching out to spend time, visits, texts, phone calls. And when I don’t respond, I hope you use that as a sign. Seek me out when that happens because it will probably be when I am most vulnerable and need your help more.
Prayers are always welcome. If you ever feel prompted to share with me how loss has impacted your life I hope that you do. I believe it would benefit both of us. It may not seem like it by the way I look or act, but that’s okay, remember I’m grieving, and that often isn’t comfortable.
Let me close with words of gratitude and appreciation. Because each time you help me this way you will be acting out of love. That gift has more value than every other thing you might provide me. Thank you.
The idea for the grieving letter is from Recovering From Losses In Life by H. Norman Wright, who got the idea from Bob Deits, who wrote Life After Loss.
I’ve shared this story before, but for those who don’t know, when I was younger it wasn’t a requirement to attend kindergarten. Because of that, my first classroom experience was first grade. I loved my teacher, I loved my school, I loved my entire first grade life. Well, most of it.Two weeks into the school year I was sent to the principal’s office. Now you have to understand, I was a well behaved kid back then. Really, I was. For me to be in trouble was a big deal. My dad was a Drill Sergeant at that time in the military so I knew not to misbehave, and if I did misbehave…well, let’s just say it would be better for me to pack my bags and go live in the treehouse.
This post from fellow blogger fortygirl is a personal account about facing a life changing event. While there are many such stories, I am struck by the honesty and the transparency of her writing. I hope we can call upon others for support through times like this.
I would like to welcome this week’s “SPOTLIGHT” Author to my blog. This talented lady, Kathryn Treat, is not only a supportive member of Rave Reviews Book Club, but she is also the Membership Director.
Her story is one that has already touched many lives and it may, very well, touch yours. So as always, sit back, relax and enjoy………
What Is She Saying?
I am not a part of this world
When I speak, strange
terms come from my lips
People look at me with my mask
as if I am an alien
Holed up here inside my room—
stripped bare of carpet
I try to keep myself and my mind occupied
There is no one to talk to who
really understands me
After all, who is allergic to their house,
and everything around them.